Every once in a while you come across a colleague or a relative who is only too happy to share with you their latest acquisition. Maybe a piece of land, a fancy car, a three bedroom flat in the suburbs of a metro or some cool shares they picked up when the market had crashed. They don’t stop there. They insist on telling you how their purchase has a good resale value and the assets will double and treble in times to come.
You are happy for them but something stings you deep inside.
No it’s not jealousy.
It is the ticker time bomb waiting to explode and tell you in a million ways how you have got left behind in the race. You give in and let it blur your vision for a while. You gulp down a double dose of self pity and curse yourself for not having been worldly wise. It is true, you need a house of your own and money in your bank when you are old. You earn well, are well read and evolved. Yet you feel like a loser.
Where exactly did you falter?
I have no answer to that.
I have no answer to that.
The only thing I can think of is that everyone’s ‘pot of gold’ is different. For some it is land. For some fancy cars. Bank balance. Great vacations. Family time. Research on their absurd idea. A film about nomads of a distant island. Saving a life. Making beautiful clothes. Discovering a new species. Winning a lemon & spoon race. Getting into a prestigious college.
Different people have different notions of what they treasure and will render their lives successful or not, depending on these achievements. (Might sound like a poor man’s escape route but it does seem true). These yardsticks may change as we grow older or remain the same but they are what we will trade our possessions for.
Mine is collecting experiences. New, old, boring, bold, reckless, painstakingly laborious, nextdoor, halfway across the globe....any kind of experience that brings me closer to basic human behaviour and instincts is something I will take any day. That is my ‘pot of gold’.
All I am wondering right now is, if my pot of gold is going to give me a warm house, good health and decent meals in my old age?
It surely has got me a pair of arms around my shoulders.
I think I will live.
Everyone’s ‘pot of gold’ is different...true. And we just need to have faith on our 'pot of gold'....because that has given us tremendous happiness...many times! :)
ReplyDeleteI know....just sometimes one gets a little jittery about things. back on track now :)
ReplyDeletethe curvaceous silloutte of the rainbow with colours vibrant not always at times hazy is most thrilling . My eyes gleam smile gliding across the bends and curves . Never really thought of the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow . Thoughts....well thoughtless state is in which we enjoy the bounties and trivialities the most . Have wondered always to live a dream like existence , for dreams/ state of sleep is the sweetest for its devoid of any thoughts , or there's least cgnizance of occurance of any. Wow to live like a bubble float and surf , live the moment and enjoy..... guess thats wat we are created for and worthy of. The moment to come is to come only if he desires so for us and if he does desire another moment for me , he will again provide , so that i live and enjoy that moment . Once i abandon the thought , the "I" too vanishes and thus remains no thought , complete bliss. Deepa
ReplyDeleteWow...what a thought. Comes drifting through and makes my heart its place to stay. Really lovely....they way you have expressed yourself :)
ReplyDeleteTrue and sooooooo dreamy :)
Vandana, my 'pot of gold' somehow resemble yours...especially with regard to "collecting experiences" :)
ReplyDelete...and a salute to Deepa for those wonderful thoughts
ReplyDeleteAh a dreamer that u are Shriraj :) so lucky you already know what your pot of gold is....takes people years ...you are so young :)
ReplyDeleteDeepa has expressed what we all feel in such lovely words. Kudos to her :)